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Dani Richards's avatar

Most people I know were all-in on the masking, taking all the shots, "we're in this together" type of thing, for the duration. As I reconnect with some of them now, they cannot relate to my experience of extreme isolation.

What I will say about that is: nothing like this extreme isolation had ever before happened to me (my office closed and we went full remote; my family refused to be around me because of the germs; when I walked outside, neighbors would do the correct thing and move to the other side of the street; everyone's face was masked; stand on the dot at the store; my book club went virtual; all gatherings cancelled; no admittance to venues without a vaccination card......)

it was the closest I have ever come to solitary confinement. Speaking to some of my friends who lived through this happily doing their part, but they all had families, friends in their "bubbles" so they could get together in their homes. They saw human faces up close and personal. I was not in their bubble. And they all expressed hatred towards the unvaccinated (many of them did not know that I was unshotted; some of them did).

OK, so I'm a big girl and I'm very resourceful and I was very aware during all of this that I was going to remain sane and get through this, and find daily happiness and peace among the insanity. It was the hardest thing I've ever done (so far in life, which has not always been a breeze). I learned a ton. I toughened up. And I kept my sanity and my nice self intact. I'm still an extravert.

But I will never forget how these "good Germans" surrounded me. Never. And how immovable they were, and still are -- so clueless about their participation in nonsensical tyranny. I called some of them out at the time, and they either looked at me with zombie eyes or became derisively outraged, just as the brainwashing had inculcated. They were the lemmings AND the pied piper. I could not break through that wall. Oh, the horror!

That is the heartbreaking devastation for me, personally: the realization that these loved ones, neighbors, coworkers, etc. were not who I thought they were, and that the only person in this world I could count upon was myself. Not what I had previously believed, and certainly not what I'd ever wanted.

OK, but I also grew closer to God with that realization. That's the good part.

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Gwyneth's avatar

“The supreme trick of mass insanity is that it persuades you that the only abnormal person is the one who refuses to join in the madness of others, the one who tries vainly to resist. We will never understand totalitarianism if we do not understand that people rarely have the strength to be uncommon.”

- Eugene Ionesco, 1983

Thank you for being uncommon.

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