Plus--and you can ask my former secretaries about this--I'm a mad reviser. I change stuff repeatedly until I get it to say what I want it to say, using as few words as I can.
That’s exactly what the Nuns (in N.J. ) taught us in high school and college - rewrite and rewrite and then rewrite the revisions……..and be as pithy as possible!
Thank you for writing this. When the lockdowns finally ended, it was obvious that society had been dipped in carbolic acid. The office culture at my place of employment disappeared entirely. We used to go to lunch together, go out for beers on Fridays. All that was gone. For a while we did 'zoom happy hours' to try and replicate the experience online, but as awkward as that was it inevitably petered out after a few months. There was a cafe near the office that formed the nucleus for an organic, ad hoc community of its own; that died, too.
Find your tribe John. There are groups out there. I am retired now. I go to weekly meetings at the Ohio Freedom Fighters. All like- minded people. It’s life affirming.
I've generally tried to maintain a social life independent from my professional life, with the former composed of the like-minded and the latter of colleagues. There are advantages to both; in the latter case, having friends that cross tribal boundaries expands one's sense of the human experience.
Dearest Mark. So poignantly written. I met my best friend at work almost 40 years ago when we could only imagine such a tragic time as this. I can’t bear to think of not having her in my life. She has helped shape me into the woman I am today. My heart breaks for all the people that may never experience a friendship like this.
You were blessed to experience such an enjoyable work experience. I pray that our youth will one day have that opportunity.
I could provide many examples. But the story was already long.
Here's one. Once, I learned it was an older colleague's birthday. I asked her what advice she could offer given her years of life experience. She said, "Mark, every day I do something I like, even if it's just for five minutes."
I thought it was a good, simple principle to live by and I try to do so.
She got cancer and died a few years after telling me that.
I enjoyed this so much! Somehow your pumpkin story reminded me of Wilson in the Tom Hanks' film Cast Away. We all need human connection to feel alive, and will make one up or wither and die.
The daughter of a close friend graduated college and began her work life sitting alone in her parents' dining room on zoom for many hours each day. This went on for over 18 months. She never met her bosses or co-workers in person. The result of this sentence of solitary confinement for a beautiful and vibrant 21 year-old was that she had a nervous breakdown, from which she is now slowly recovering.
I am disgusted by the WAH class who sat cozily at home in their sweatpants with their significant others, having everything delivered , who gave no thought to an entire generation of young people who were denied the opportunity to make the human connections that could have made it more bearable.
In the early part of this crime, I found myself entirely alone in my opinion that 1) We were witnessing an "operation". The idea that vast swathes of the economy would be "shut down" to protect against a respiratory infection?? I mean, how freaking obvious do the lowlifes have to make it?? Evidently, not obvious enough as the crime being perpetrated was lost on the vast majority. 2) I asked the question -- "Well, what about all the people who can't work from home like us "beautiful people"? Only two weeks, this allegedly highly intelligent, savvy, edu-macated, experienced cohort told me. Uh, huh. Sure. 3) What about the kids -- the kids from low-income and poor families? Remote learning?????? (One example--we know personally of a low-income family that does fine; they get by...Not a fancy home, but a home...where they all live, mind their business, live their lives. Then the kids get sent home to "learn from home". Oh, really??? Five kids, one computer. How's that gonna work? Even if the school provided the laptops, they're all in different grades with different teachers, so they'll all need to be online at or near the same time. This family didn't have the money for broadband Internet!!!)
What this has revealed about people? Especially the "Zoom" class? My view of people has been altered forever and not for the better. I'm with Mark in terms of forgiveness. OTOH, this whole "thing" we're in? It did need a wrecking ball, if truth be told. Just too bad it had to come in the form of a global crime against humanity that the majority of its victims agreed to, cooperated with, and celebrated.
Early in 2020, when this “ virus emergency” began to blossom in earnest, how could people NOT realize it was the presidential election in 9 or 10 months - the timing !!!
It had to hurt President Trump - what a coincidence………..
'Operation Warp Speed shows what is possible if the FDA is pushed out of the way— an innovative drug [clotshot]can come to market in months.
That is amazing.
Donald Trump became a drug company pitch man...
His administration made the drug available through government channels.
It used the full force of government to make it available... It provided funding..And he promoted it...good people are dying at the hands of this monster.'
Did the Shot Kill Ivana?
By lan Stevo
The greatest President of my lifetime is Donald Trump...
I think we can say that it’s about a lot more than US politics Rosemary. Getting the Biden puppet installed was certainly one objective among many though.
Sure...the scum in high places had to get rid of Trump because he wasn't supposed to get elected in the first place. That was supposed to happen to that wretch, Hilary Clinton, in 2016. That's the reason for the absolutely psychotic reaction to Trump's election and their relentless persecution and prosecution.
Had Hilary been elected like she was "supposed" to be, this "operation" would have been "COV!D-17" as planned, and everything that we've been through (a version thereof) would have happened sooner. The psychos the world over have been planning to turn this into a prison planet for a 𝒍𝒐𝒏𝒈 time.
Trump's election did slow things down -- a lot. Thus, in 2020, these scum had to make absolutely sure that Trump did not get reelected. He did, as we know -- but many of the same "MAGA" people who voted for him went home willingly in 2020, remained silent, put on their masks, and rolled up their sleeves. All in the name of a fraud -- an eye-watering, global criminal fraud. "Americans".
❤️ I can still see myself ranting and raving around our living room, arms waving, asking in essence in a "raised voice", "What in the AF???" They're gonna shut it down and people are going to cooperate with this???? Because of an "official story" about a respiratory infection???
(Mark, native New Yorker here, born in Brooklyn to Brooklyn-born-and-raised parents, the children of immigrants. Raised in upstate NY, moved back to Brooklyn, worked in Manhattan when that was actually fun -- and crazy. Knew and worked with great people from "Jersey". :) Ended up in MA for grad school. Got hired before graduating, so stayed. For nearly 30 years until the "operation". Husband and I dedicated deep in our souls to liberty -- and this crime and the cooperation with it was just too much for us. Left the NE for good late last summer for "Fortress Florida". Love your writing. I feel like we're kindred spirits...)
The laptop class lockdown enthusiasts are the epitome of the sentiment "I've got mine, fuck you." How'd they meet their significant others? Much of the time, at work, or through friends made at work. How do they propose younger people socialize? "LOL that's their problem."
Actually it serves a purpose. I am not young and was divorced in my late 50s. I resorted to online dating service to meet men. And I stress the meet as the only aspect "online" was the match up and a few exchanged messages as a means to narrow down the field for in person introductions. It was an interesting experience. I met some stinkers as well as some that though I had no romantic interest in were good and interesting people. And, I am 2 1/2 years into a relationship with a great guy. As with most things in life you have to at least approach them with an open mind.
My young, professional daughter has also met someone using an online service. It's better than the bar scene of my youth.
Unfortunately I have to disagree with both of you. In my circle 90% of people got married(!) through the most famous swiping app and at the moment people look happy also have already kids etc. Let's see in 20-30 years but to dismiss a new tool outright is not very open-minded.
What's sad is that many of these younger people have been some of the most zealous about embracing remote work and Zoom hangouts.
It must be that the education system has primed them to be conformist and unquestioning, or perhaps their instinct for "solidarity" and "safety" has been weaponised by the powers-that-be.
Whatever the reason it's proving hard to help people who don't want to help themselves. How do you explain to a 22-year-old that a set-up which seems cushy and convenient today might feel utterly dystopian and suffocating down the road once they realise they wasted their youth living through a screen while failing to nurture real-life relationships?
The lockdown didn't last long where I live. But I was already isolated due to disability and poverty. This just made my loneliness worse. Never before have I loathed my singleness so much.
And I have always hated it since turning 23. Yet so many of the Covidians were childless single women. Go figure!
Had a Covidian friend explain (by phone long distance) that she prefers her "alone time" and discovered she really hates being around other people. She prefers teaching entirely online. I suspect a lot of these Covid worshipping spinsters had dating fatigue (and maybe career burn out) so they grabbed the first lame excuse to justify permanently holding others at arm's length to avoid pain.
my college aged sons lost over a year of the college experience because of the stupid university locking them down to online learning. Both sons say they would quit school before going back to online again. Plus they lost so much of the socializing done in college! It's already deteriorating because of the stupid phones. Students don't talk to the others when passing each other on campus. I have another son entering college this fall - I can only hope the school isn't that weak again. I'm sure another "threat" is on the horizon. Ugh! Where can we direct all of this anger???
why do they have to do everything publicly? they could tell us individually that they think we are selfish, but instead they put it out on their social media.
I have worked independently, from a home office, for many years now. The decision was made originally to accommodate life with preteens and teens. It allowed me to be more present in their young lives. However, I have regretted what I lost by leaving an interactive office and the longer I have worked this way, the more I feel that loss.
Early on in 2020 when it seemed that everyone was so pro about working remotely I wondered how long it would take to also recognize the downsides and long term losses. I especially think it not a good thing for young persons starting a career. It is quite sad that we are living such isolated lives.
This resonates deeply. I could write an essay in response … about my community college job I used to love, about my own fears for my teenagers’ futures, about the book club that no longer meets.
So on point Mark. Office life was such a big portion of our lives previously. Friendships, personal contact and romances have been lost to this scamdemic. While I don’t miss the daily commute to work, it was my knitting and reading time. I really miss the organic contact and conversation that office life brought. It has allowed me to vacate northern jersey as I type this from my new home and next week home-office in the same job, I will have to find a new way to meet people here.
I circumvented office life all my working life.....and never made a career either. but always had fun and superficial friendships with co-workers. it's the treadmill that makes me nervous and, well, greener pastures on the other side of the fence and so on ;-))
yup, tell me about it! still, the choices we make often lead to a powerful experience, be it good or bad (both of which are totally subjective and biased adjectives).
Fun piece here Mark, with a compelling conclusion, as I expected! I’m a lawyer too. I chuckled out loud reading about the food. Lawyers LOVE free food. That alone should keep them coming back to the office.
Thanks for staying with it, Steve, when you might have wondered, "Where is he going with this?"
There were many days when I wished I could have worked from home. But then, there are many days when I don't feel like exercising and I push myself to do so and then feel better for having done so.
Also, there are various places I didn't want to go/things I didn't want to do that turned out to be outstanding and/or life-enhancing.
That is so true! And I think some of the best ( and unforeseen) outcomes in my life began with a leap of faith into the unknown, or from pure serendipity. Seems to me these life enhancing moments only occur when you’re out mixing it up among people.
Lordy. I’m going to depress you.: started in residential, then moved to mostly commercial real estate... and lots of corp. law and some estate work . Exciting, huh? But we’re always finding ways to be interested in our work, and I had much to keep it interesting. And experiences with my employees and clients and peers kept it all worthwhile. I’m running my decease father’s commercial real estate business now. But I’m keeping my law license just in case. I live in SE NC.
we definitely need each other. I am an introvert, and I had just started getting out and doing some volunteer work since my kids are grown now. I was starting to feel more comfortable around people and forced myself to continue because I knew it was good for me. Then covid hit. I think I've backslid 10 years because of it. I can feel my social anxiety rising anytime I have to be around a lot of people. Starting over :(
I started working from home almost 20 years ago, and I have really enjoyed being home. My old commutes were about 45 min one way, and I never liked having to work 'normal hours' as my mornings are more sacred to me, and would be spent on the freeway and then inside a big artificially lit office with ceiling vents that usually spewed cold air when I was already cold. And essentially what I do (drafting) can be done anywhere. I figure I am working to essentially pay for my house, and I would rather BE HERE more, and not less. And I eat much better, save alot by never buying lunch, which I usually would buy out when I worked out. Also, I am very sensitive to noises and external distractions to the point of not getting much done with what most would consider average distractions. Home work is good for me and I am sticking with it! Much happier and more productive.
Mark, have you considered getting to know your neighbors or having block parties? Maybe a pancake breakfast on a cool morning? It's going to be important that we make networks around us.
We're being divided. Soon we will be pitted against one another. Look at the similarities to what Mao did to demonize one group, starve people, isolate them and have them fight one another just to stay alive.
Oh boy, I wish we were neighbors. I would love your pranks...and I love block parties and miss garage sales with the community too....It took me more than a few weeks to be on Team Reality, but once I had opened my eyes and understood what was going on, I shared the news with friends and family, and I am still waiting for many of them to have their "aha" moment ....lost some good friends( oh well), but gained some new ones. Family? Well.....work in progress. Things I was not willing to give up were my ability to choose, my curiosity, and my search for the truth. How can you live with yourself when you bend your will for others? Not I. Even family loses out.
Glad I live in rural Indiana. All 3 local dineries stayed solvent--and open for most of the past 2 years. I go to them for human contact since I live alone and can only work remotely due to disability. I also love my church.
PS: I worked in a small law office for 40 years, starting out full time and then part time as I had my children. We had a great working relationship, like a good marriage without the benefits. My boss, Jim and I became great friends to the point that when he recently passed away, I was noted in his obituary. Sad to have lost such a great person and friend.
I relate to this. I spent many hours in an office starring at my computer feeling like a failure for not getting anything done because I found the noise around me too distracting. I had to work at home anyways, or work like my dad did by going into work super early before anyone else was there.
Your stories have that LIFE vibration to them, they remind us of the goodness and openness in which we previously could do ordinary things which would give us joy. Just being normal, with its ups and downs, feeling of being in life. One or two children's books year ago used to capture this golden feeling, which permeates your writing Mark, thank you.
My first job was in a federal court clerk’s office. The Chief Deputy was a country girl as salty as the Pacific Ocean. I’m quite sure that she never spent an hour inside a college classroom in her entire life, but she’d risen to the top position because she was simply excellent.
She was brimming with country bromides like “If you like it, I love it” (pronounced with a very small town country twang) meaning “You do it as you see fit, here’s my official concurrence to your plan” and “Sweatin’ like a whore in church.” Many of her other sayings were unprintable in a family newspaper, at least in those more civilized days.
Truth be told, I probably wasn’t her biggest fan when I started there. We were different in every possible way - socially, politically, religiously, educationally.
The chief judge’s permanent law clerk (a lifelong batchelor) was even further removed from the Chief Deputy’s personality. He was reserved where she was brash, reticent where she was foul-mouthed. He listened to Bach, she liked Reba (McIntyre). But over the years those two unlikely confidants became the closest of close friends.
I miss those people so much. I miss the American office too.
I was watching a major league baseball game yesterday- a Master Sergeant with a chest full of medals sang "God Bless America". His voice was beautiful- it had passion and empathy- I confess I had a tear run down my cheek. I so want to believe that the old America still exists, but it's so hard to see anymore- little snippets of the America I remember from the 50's and 60's is all I can muster. Mark, your storytelling is superior, even though your clearly frustrated and angry. Deep down, you're an optimist, I just know it. Keep writing what you feel- a bunch of us are gonna read and reflect on your stories and maybe laugh out loud- and maybe things can turn around. Keep em coming!
Working in Manhattan on "Madison Avenue" during the first half of my career was an experience I wouldn't trade for the world. The spontaneous in-person sharing of ideas was—and still is—critical to the success of any creative industry. Also, staring at the Chrysler Building or watching the QE2 glide up the Hudson past the Statue of Liberty from your office at sunset (check and check) cannot be replaced by any screen saver.
I agree wholeheartedly. Loved working in Manhattan in the mid 90's; never a dull moment. Creative bullets flying everywhere..I miss it! My son lives there now, and he feels the same energy.
I am familiar with both Manhattan & Brooklyn, both once vibrant, creative powerhouses. Same with Soho in London. Go back 30 years and these were the places where human imagination unfettered by woke ideology flourished. I know, I was part of it. Now if I was to project my true self into interactions here I could not work.
You are an outstanding writer, if you haven't figured that out already.
Thanks, T.
Three chords and the truth.
Plus--and you can ask my former secretaries about this--I'm a mad reviser. I change stuff repeatedly until I get it to say what I want it to say, using as few words as I can.
That’s exactly what the Nuns (in N.J. ) taught us in high school and college - rewrite and rewrite and then rewrite the revisions……..and be as pithy as possible!
I was going to write you a short letter. But I didn't have time, so I wrote you a long one instead.
Thank you Mark Twain.
I'm sure we're all glad that you did :))
Wasn't George Washington reputed to have said something like that?
Exactly!
too many rewritten revisions is how I got stuck in writing my PhD (in Cultural Anthopology). but I became an editor instead :-))
Yeah, but you do it so well. Loved the Pumpkin story. And I agree with your assessment on the Scamdemic measures that have totalitarianized our lives.
Mark is a master of taking prosaic life events and showing readers the significance of same.
Thank you for writing this. When the lockdowns finally ended, it was obvious that society had been dipped in carbolic acid. The office culture at my place of employment disappeared entirely. We used to go to lunch together, go out for beers on Fridays. All that was gone. For a while we did 'zoom happy hours' to try and replicate the experience online, but as awkward as that was it inevitably petered out after a few months. There was a cafe near the office that formed the nucleus for an organic, ad hoc community of its own; that died, too.
The joy has been sucked out of life.
Drinking cold ones on Zoom?
Dystopian nightmare! If that happened to me, I'd write about it. So you should.
Were people that afraid of each other?
I'm an academic, so: yes, yes they were, they fell for it all hook, line, and sinker, and most of them continue to do so.
Zoom happy hour was every bit as cringe as it sounds.
I work at a university. College administrators' reactions to Corona have shown that these people and their acolytes are not at all intelligent.
Either that, or they knew they were tools happy to effect the Scam.
My niece had a zoom baby shower.
Really???😳
I didn’t attend in protest because I would not be allowed to attend in person due to being unjabbed.
so true, and not only in an office environment, but also close friends, some family.
For many, it created or enhanced depression.
So many negative people.
Sometimes, I just do not care anymore.
Find your tribe John. There are groups out there. I am retired now. I go to weekly meetings at the Ohio Freedom Fighters. All like- minded people. It’s life affirming.
I've generally tried to maintain a social life independent from my professional life, with the former composed of the like-minded and the latter of colleagues. There are advantages to both; in the latter case, having friends that cross tribal boundaries expands one's sense of the human experience.
Dearest Mark. So poignantly written. I met my best friend at work almost 40 years ago when we could only imagine such a tragic time as this. I can’t bear to think of not having her in my life. She has helped shape me into the woman I am today. My heart breaks for all the people that may never experience a friendship like this.
You were blessed to experience such an enjoyable work experience. I pray that our youth will one day have that opportunity.
God bless you for sharing this beautiful story.
Amen, Laura.
I could provide many examples. But the story was already long.
Here's one. Once, I learned it was an older colleague's birthday. I asked her what advice she could offer given her years of life experience. She said, "Mark, every day I do something I like, even if it's just for five minutes."
I thought it was a good, simple principle to live by and I try to do so.
She got cancer and died a few years after telling me that.
What a gift she gave you and I know you treasure it! God rest her beautiful soul.
Yes, Sindy (her spelling) was someone I would never have met outside of work. Demographically different from me.
I enjoyed this so much! Somehow your pumpkin story reminded me of Wilson in the Tom Hanks' film Cast Away. We all need human connection to feel alive, and will make one up or wither and die.
The daughter of a close friend graduated college and began her work life sitting alone in her parents' dining room on zoom for many hours each day. This went on for over 18 months. She never met her bosses or co-workers in person. The result of this sentence of solitary confinement for a beautiful and vibrant 21 year-old was that she had a nervous breakdown, from which she is now slowly recovering.
I am disgusted by the WAH class who sat cozily at home in their sweatpants with their significant others, having everything delivered , who gave no thought to an entire generation of young people who were denied the opportunity to make the human connections that could have made it more bearable.
Thanks, Momo.
Lockdowns, masks, tests, shots. All so very evil.
In the early part of this crime, I found myself entirely alone in my opinion that 1) We were witnessing an "operation". The idea that vast swathes of the economy would be "shut down" to protect against a respiratory infection?? I mean, how freaking obvious do the lowlifes have to make it?? Evidently, not obvious enough as the crime being perpetrated was lost on the vast majority. 2) I asked the question -- "Well, what about all the people who can't work from home like us "beautiful people"? Only two weeks, this allegedly highly intelligent, savvy, edu-macated, experienced cohort told me. Uh, huh. Sure. 3) What about the kids -- the kids from low-income and poor families? Remote learning?????? (One example--we know personally of a low-income family that does fine; they get by...Not a fancy home, but a home...where they all live, mind their business, live their lives. Then the kids get sent home to "learn from home". Oh, really??? Five kids, one computer. How's that gonna work? Even if the school provided the laptops, they're all in different grades with different teachers, so they'll all need to be online at or near the same time. This family didn't have the money for broadband Internet!!!)
What this has revealed about people? Especially the "Zoom" class? My view of people has been altered forever and not for the better. I'm with Mark in terms of forgiveness. OTOH, this whole "thing" we're in? It did need a wrecking ball, if truth be told. Just too bad it had to come in the form of a global crime against humanity that the majority of its victims agreed to, cooperated with, and celebrated.
all of this ruination and destruction, just to get rid of Trump. World wide revolt from the devil. And look how that turned out?
Everything these power freaks touch turns to poo
Early in 2020, when this “ virus emergency” began to blossom in earnest, how could people NOT realize it was the presidential election in 9 or 10 months - the timing !!!
It had to hurt President Trump - what a coincidence………..
definitely
alas,ms Nan, here's a real bubble burster...'TRUMP WAS A HERO & BETRAYED IT ALL WITH DEATH SHOT PROMOTION'
lewrockwell.com /2022/07/allan-stevo/frankensteins-monster-did-the-shot-kill-ivana/
'Operation Warp Speed shows what is possible if the FDA is pushed out of the way— an innovative drug [clotshot]can come to market in months.
That is amazing.
Donald Trump became a drug company pitch man...
His administration made the drug available through government channels.
It used the full force of government to make it available... It provided funding..And he promoted it...good people are dying at the hands of this monster.'
Did the Shot Kill Ivana?
By lan Stevo
The greatest President of my lifetime is Donald Trump...
I'm not an American but to be fair: if you think "the catastrophe" he was facing and the corrupted experts,
short of doing all the safety checking himself....
I mean it's easy to say now he shouldn't have trusted
them but, those were gov. agencies entrusted with
the nation's health and wellbeing. The good (if one can say that) in all that tragic tale is that it has unraveled
and shoved how corrupted the whole system really is.
I think we can say that it’s about a lot more than US politics Rosemary. Getting the Biden puppet installed was certainly one objective among many though.
Not just Trump. It's going on all over. And the Reset still continues. They're just mixing things up so enough NPC people will continue to comply.
Sure...the scum in high places had to get rid of Trump because he wasn't supposed to get elected in the first place. That was supposed to happen to that wretch, Hilary Clinton, in 2016. That's the reason for the absolutely psychotic reaction to Trump's election and their relentless persecution and prosecution.
Had Hilary been elected like she was "supposed" to be, this "operation" would have been "COV!D-17" as planned, and everything that we've been through (a version thereof) would have happened sooner. The psychos the world over have been planning to turn this into a prison planet for a 𝒍𝒐𝒏𝒈 time.
Trump's election did slow things down -- a lot. Thus, in 2020, these scum had to make absolutely sure that Trump did not get reelected. He did, as we know -- but many of the same "MAGA" people who voted for him went home willingly in 2020, remained silent, put on their masks, and rolled up their sleeves. All in the name of a fraud -- an eye-watering, global criminal fraud. "Americans".
let's not make jokes about poo (or maybe we should??) - https://www.thegatewaypundit.com/2022/07/democrats-democrats-authorities-investigating-feces-sent-mail-25-ohio-gop-state-senators/
Amen.
I've said all of this from Day 1.
❤️ I can still see myself ranting and raving around our living room, arms waving, asking in essence in a "raised voice", "What in the AF???" They're gonna shut it down and people are going to cooperate with this???? Because of an "official story" about a respiratory infection???
(Mark, native New Yorker here, born in Brooklyn to Brooklyn-born-and-raised parents, the children of immigrants. Raised in upstate NY, moved back to Brooklyn, worked in Manhattan when that was actually fun -- and crazy. Knew and worked with great people from "Jersey". :) Ended up in MA for grad school. Got hired before graduating, so stayed. For nearly 30 years until the "operation". Husband and I dedicated deep in our souls to liberty -- and this crime and the cooperation with it was just too much for us. Left the NE for good late last summer for "Fortress Florida". Love your writing. I feel like we're kindred spirits...)
The laptop class lockdown enthusiasts are the epitome of the sentiment "I've got mine, fuck you." How'd they meet their significant others? Much of the time, at work, or through friends made at work. How do they propose younger people socialize? "LOL that's their problem."
John, your summary of the "enthusiasts'" sentiment? Absolutely 100% spot on. They have revealed themselves. All of them.
Amen.
unfortunately a lot of the young people have resorted to online dating. That phrase just makes me cringe.
Actually it serves a purpose. I am not young and was divorced in my late 50s. I resorted to online dating service to meet men. And I stress the meet as the only aspect "online" was the match up and a few exchanged messages as a means to narrow down the field for in person introductions. It was an interesting experience. I met some stinkers as well as some that though I had no romantic interest in were good and interesting people. And, I am 2 1/2 years into a relationship with a great guy. As with most things in life you have to at least approach them with an open mind.
My young, professional daughter has also met someone using an online service. It's better than the bar scene of my youth.
The worst. Only good for hook ups.
Unfortunately I have to disagree with both of you. In my circle 90% of people got married(!) through the most famous swiping app and at the moment people look happy also have already kids etc. Let's see in 20-30 years but to dismiss a new tool outright is not very open-minded.
What's sad is that many of these younger people have been some of the most zealous about embracing remote work and Zoom hangouts.
It must be that the education system has primed them to be conformist and unquestioning, or perhaps their instinct for "solidarity" and "safety" has been weaponised by the powers-that-be.
Whatever the reason it's proving hard to help people who don't want to help themselves. How do you explain to a 22-year-old that a set-up which seems cushy and convenient today might feel utterly dystopian and suffocating down the road once they realise they wasted their youth living through a screen while failing to nurture real-life relationships?
The lockdown didn't last long where I live. But I was already isolated due to disability and poverty. This just made my loneliness worse. Never before have I loathed my singleness so much.
And I have always hated it since turning 23. Yet so many of the Covidians were childless single women. Go figure!
Had a Covidian friend explain (by phone long distance) that she prefers her "alone time" and discovered she really hates being around other people. She prefers teaching entirely online. I suspect a lot of these Covid worshipping spinsters had dating fatigue (and maybe career burn out) so they grabbed the first lame excuse to justify permanently holding others at arm's length to avoid pain.
First to get vaxxed too. And they live in cities depending on truckers and farmers for food supplies.
They will "get theirs" soon enough. After alienating a number of friends, family, and neighbors who would normally have been there to help.
my college aged sons lost over a year of the college experience because of the stupid university locking them down to online learning. Both sons say they would quit school before going back to online again. Plus they lost so much of the socializing done in college! It's already deteriorating because of the stupid phones. Students don't talk to the others when passing each other on campus. I have another son entering college this fall - I can only hope the school isn't that weak again. I'm sure another "threat" is on the horizon. Ugh! Where can we direct all of this anger???
Or people losing their family businesses or homes. And ACCUSED them of being selfish on Facebook.
why do they have to do everything publicly? they could tell us individually that they think we are selfish, but instead they put it out on their social media.
They're drama queens.
I have worked independently, from a home office, for many years now. The decision was made originally to accommodate life with preteens and teens. It allowed me to be more present in their young lives. However, I have regretted what I lost by leaving an interactive office and the longer I have worked this way, the more I feel that loss.
Early on in 2020 when it seemed that everyone was so pro about working remotely I wondered how long it would take to also recognize the downsides and long term losses. I especially think it not a good thing for young persons starting a career. It is quite sad that we are living such isolated lives.
This resonates deeply. I could write an essay in response … about my community college job I used to love, about my own fears for my teenagers’ futures, about the book club that no longer meets.
You should write that. I would read it.
Yes, do so... writing is cathartic.
So on point Mark. Office life was such a big portion of our lives previously. Friendships, personal contact and romances have been lost to this scamdemic. While I don’t miss the daily commute to work, it was my knitting and reading time. I really miss the organic contact and conversation that office life brought. It has allowed me to vacate northern jersey as I type this from my new home and next week home-office in the same job, I will have to find a new way to meet people here.
I circumvented office life all my working life.....and never made a career either. but always had fun and superficial friendships with co-workers. it's the treadmill that makes me nervous and, well, greener pastures on the other side of the fence and so on ;-))
Re: greener pastures: one has to be careful, there could be
a leaking septic tank behind it all! :))
yup, tell me about it! still, the choices we make often lead to a powerful experience, be it good or bad (both of which are totally subjective and biased adjectives).
Fun piece here Mark, with a compelling conclusion, as I expected! I’m a lawyer too. I chuckled out loud reading about the food. Lawyers LOVE free food. That alone should keep them coming back to the office.
Thanks for staying with it, Steve, when you might have wondered, "Where is he going with this?"
There were many days when I wished I could have worked from home. But then, there are many days when I don't feel like exercising and I push myself to do so and then feel better for having done so.
Also, there are various places I didn't want to go/things I didn't want to do that turned out to be outstanding and/or life-enhancing.
That is so true! And I think some of the best ( and unforeseen) outcomes in my life began with a leap of faith into the unknown, or from pure serendipity. Seems to me these life enhancing moments only occur when you’re out mixing it up among people.
Amen, Steve. And truthfully, sometimes the dreaded experience is as bad as you expected. But you can't find out unless you do it.
Where do you live? What type of law do you do?
Lordy. I’m going to depress you.: started in residential, then moved to mostly commercial real estate... and lots of corp. law and some estate work . Exciting, huh? But we’re always finding ways to be interested in our work, and I had much to keep it interesting. And experiences with my employees and clients and peers kept it all worthwhile. I’m running my decease father’s commercial real estate business now. But I’m keeping my law license just in case. I live in SE NC.
Peels of laughter. Thanks 🎃
Thanks, Stephenie. I feel and express so much overall darkness now. I wanted to give readers a break.from that.
But at the same time, I wanted to sincerely make a point about another big Coronamania-driven loss. People need other people.
And I was kind of proud of that prank. It was unique. And easy to pull off. The idea just came to me.
Mission accomplished!
we definitely need each other. I am an introvert, and I had just started getting out and doing some volunteer work since my kids are grown now. I was starting to feel more comfortable around people and forced myself to continue because I knew it was good for me. Then covid hit. I think I've backslid 10 years because of it. I can feel my social anxiety rising anytime I have to be around a lot of people. Starting over :(
Your creative bent is amazing - so glad you share it here!
I started working from home almost 20 years ago, and I have really enjoyed being home. My old commutes were about 45 min one way, and I never liked having to work 'normal hours' as my mornings are more sacred to me, and would be spent on the freeway and then inside a big artificially lit office with ceiling vents that usually spewed cold air when I was already cold. And essentially what I do (drafting) can be done anywhere. I figure I am working to essentially pay for my house, and I would rather BE HERE more, and not less. And I eat much better, save alot by never buying lunch, which I usually would buy out when I worked out. Also, I am very sensitive to noises and external distractions to the point of not getting much done with what most would consider average distractions. Home work is good for me and I am sticking with it! Much happier and more productive.
Not everyone's the same.
But I was grateful to have a place to go and people to be with.
Mark, have you considered getting to know your neighbors or having block parties? Maybe a pancake breakfast on a cool morning? It's going to be important that we make networks around us.
We're being divided. Soon we will be pitted against one another. Look at the similarities to what Mao did to demonize one group, starve people, isolate them and have them fight one another just to stay alive.
My neighbors hate me b/c I saw the Scam from Day 1. and told them so.
To deal with me is to admit how wrong they've been and how much destruction they've done.
Oh boy, I wish we were neighbors. I would love your pranks...and I love block parties and miss garage sales with the community too....It took me more than a few weeks to be on Team Reality, but once I had opened my eyes and understood what was going on, I shared the news with friends and family, and I am still waiting for many of them to have their "aha" moment ....lost some good friends( oh well), but gained some new ones. Family? Well.....work in progress. Things I was not willing to give up were my ability to choose, my curiosity, and my search for the truth. How can you live with yourself when you bend your will for others? Not I. Even family loses out.
Glad I live in rural Indiana. All 3 local dineries stayed solvent--and open for most of the past 2 years. I go to them for human contact since I live alone and can only work remotely due to disability. I also love my church.
I agree, remote work is better for some, like my daughter who is mostly antisocial. She’s done it for 7 years and wouldn’t have it any other way.
PS: I worked in a small law office for 40 years, starting out full time and then part time as I had my children. We had a great working relationship, like a good marriage without the benefits. My boss, Jim and I became great friends to the point that when he recently passed away, I was noted in his obituary. Sad to have lost such a great person and friend.
I relate to this. I spent many hours in an office starring at my computer feeling like a failure for not getting anything done because I found the noise around me too distracting. I had to work at home anyways, or work like my dad did by going into work super early before anyone else was there.
No story book ending designed into this system.
Your stories have that LIFE vibration to them, they remind us of the goodness and openness in which we previously could do ordinary things which would give us joy. Just being normal, with its ups and downs, feeling of being in life. One or two children's books year ago used to capture this golden feeling, which permeates your writing Mark, thank you.
Thanks, sn.
I think about stuff at work and when I come home, I write it down.
“As a weight control strategy, people would bring unwanted junk food from home and leave it on the table.”
I am seeing a potential flaw in this strategy.
If you eat my junk food, I won't have to feel bad about throwing it in the garbage.
Soy, I have a story I'm working on that quotes you at length. I'll probably post it in 2-3 weeks.
I am a huge admirer of your writing Mark. Looking forward to it.
Hey Mark, good to know you do your lifting with "bent knees not back", I thought it was like when telling a story in person "yes, yes
I remembered to lift with the bent knees", if you know what I mean :))
My first job was in a federal court clerk’s office. The Chief Deputy was a country girl as salty as the Pacific Ocean. I’m quite sure that she never spent an hour inside a college classroom in her entire life, but she’d risen to the top position because she was simply excellent.
She was brimming with country bromides like “If you like it, I love it” (pronounced with a very small town country twang) meaning “You do it as you see fit, here’s my official concurrence to your plan” and “Sweatin’ like a whore in church.” Many of her other sayings were unprintable in a family newspaper, at least in those more civilized days.
Truth be told, I probably wasn’t her biggest fan when I started there. We were different in every possible way - socially, politically, religiously, educationally.
The chief judge’s permanent law clerk (a lifelong batchelor) was even further removed from the Chief Deputy’s personality. He was reserved where she was brash, reticent where she was foul-mouthed. He listened to Bach, she liked Reba (McIntyre). But over the years those two unlikely confidants became the closest of close friends.
I miss those people so much. I miss the American office too.
I was watching a major league baseball game yesterday- a Master Sergeant with a chest full of medals sang "God Bless America". His voice was beautiful- it had passion and empathy- I confess I had a tear run down my cheek. I so want to believe that the old America still exists, but it's so hard to see anymore- little snippets of the America I remember from the 50's and 60's is all I can muster. Mark, your storytelling is superior, even though your clearly frustrated and angry. Deep down, you're an optimist, I just know it. Keep writing what you feel- a bunch of us are gonna read and reflect on your stories and maybe laugh out loud- and maybe things can turn around. Keep em coming!
Thanks, Mike.
As I wrote last week, it's very hard to be optimistic.
Working in Manhattan on "Madison Avenue" during the first half of my career was an experience I wouldn't trade for the world. The spontaneous in-person sharing of ideas was—and still is—critical to the success of any creative industry. Also, staring at the Chrysler Building or watching the QE2 glide up the Hudson past the Statue of Liberty from your office at sunset (check and check) cannot be replaced by any screen saver.
I agree wholeheartedly. Loved working in Manhattan in the mid 90's; never a dull moment. Creative bullets flying everywhere..I miss it! My son lives there now, and he feels the same energy.
I am familiar with both Manhattan & Brooklyn, both once vibrant, creative powerhouses. Same with Soho in London. Go back 30 years and these were the places where human imagination unfettered by woke ideology flourished. I know, I was part of it. Now if I was to project my true self into interactions here I could not work.
Luckily I don’t need to.